News Wellness

CDC Issues New Guidelines for Using Urinals Amid COVID-19 Pandemic

In order to reduce the spread of Coronavirus, the CDC has released a new set of guidelines for individuals who use bathroom urinals.  

“Everyone uses urinals,” said Dr. Anthony Fauci, “Because there is no part of the population that doesn’t stand up to pee, we need to address this aspect of public health in order to contain the pandemic.” 

Urinals increase the likelihood of touching porcelain, which are often contaminated by unwashed hands. Unsanitary porcelain is common in public areas such as Walmart, public parks and Wells Fargo branches.

“We do not know whether these guidelines will be 100% effective in stopping the spread of coronavirus. But we need to overreact in every single sector as a means to an end.” 

The following are the current CDC mandated Urinal Usage Guidelines: 

  1. Business and public sector bathrooms are mandated to install a hand-sink next to or above a urinal to encourage excessive handwashing. 
  2. CDC recommends people of all ages NOT to urinate over their underwear, but rather through or under it, to decrease the likelihood of touching one’s genitals with compromised hands. 
  3. Traditional bathroom stalls from this moment forward will be reserved for Essential Workers only. 

Before entering a bathroom: 

  1. An individual needing to urinate must check in with a CDC official at a Quarantine Tent at each bathroom entrance. 
  2. Officials will screen urinal users by taking their temperature and recording all travels taken in the past month. 
  3. Once the individual passes the screening, they will be issued a CDC sanitary bag containing medical grade toilet paper. 

Once at the urinal, Individuals must follow these operating parameters:

  1. An individual will first wash all of their hands at the pre-installed urinal sink.
  2. The individual must take 2-4 paces back from the urinal. Human to urinal interaction must be six feet apart at all times.
  3. The individual must then prepare the urethra for discharge. Initial point of attack is critical. Individuals must aim in the general direction of the drain in order to flatten the curve. 
  4. When the urethral stream is finished, individuals should pat the surrounding genital area dry with the medical grade toilet paper received upon entrance. Dispose of all used and unused paper in a biohazard-waste receptacle.
  5. Individuals must then proceed to the traditional “second-sink” and wash hands for a MINIMUM of 20 seconds.
  6. CDC advises individuals not to dry their hands by themselves. All hand drying activities will be completed by licensed CDC personnel before exiting the bathroom.