Well, Actually

Out of an Abundance of Caution, I Will No Longer Be Sifting Through the Office Garbage Cans for Recyclables

With schools and stores closing, every event getting canceled, and the country on high alert, this Coronavirus Pandemic is really getting serious. We have to sterilize everything, avoid touching our faces, and wash our hands at least once an hour. People’s personal hygiene habits are drastically changing, so mine must also. 

Due to this new normal we all must live in, I have decided that I will no longer be going through the office garbage cans to pluck out recyclables. This makes me extremely upset because I care about the environment and reducing waste and pollution so much. Unfortunately, my environmental stewardship must be put on hold because protecting the planet will put me at risk for contracting coronavirus.

It’s going to absolutely kill me seeing plastic water bottles and perfectly good pieces of paper lying in the office garbage bins. Normally I’d just walk by, sift through the trash, and take what I can to the recycling bin that’s literally two feet away. But, now, it’s tough. I don’t know if Jeff’s sales reports have been coughed on or if Anita is an asymptomatic carrier of COVID-19 and all her germs are on the unrinsed Snapple Apple she just threw out. 

Ugh, I wish my coworkers cared more about recycling and the environment! Sorry, Mother Nature, saving you will have to be put on hold until this pandemic is over. 

Image source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/slumtourist/24974052396