Thanks to Capitalism, Working Man’s Two Cents Now Worth One

Wow! Capitalism has failed us again. Recent studies have shown that the rise in corporate greed has resulted in the average working man’s two cents now being worth one. Blue-collar workers across America have begun saving up their two cents until they have at least four cents before giving them away.

To fight this, left-wing activist groups have been championing the redistribution of wealth. The devaluation of the working man’s cents has rejuvenated the spirit of that progressive movement, with working-class America organizing marches down the streets of New York City and Washington D.C. advocating for a raise to eight cents. Too bad they don’t have any common sense!