Wow! Capitalism has failed us again. Recent studies have shown that the rise in corporate greed has resulted in the average working man’s two cents now being worth one. Blue-collar workers across America have begun saving up their two cents until they have at least four cents before giving them away.
To fight this, left-wing activist groups have been championing the redistribution of wealth. The devaluation of the working man’s cents has rejuvenated the spirit of that progressive movement, with working-class America organizing marches down the streets of New York City and Washington D.C. advocating for a raise to eight cents. Too bad they don’t have any common sense!